Athleisure wear is sweeping the nation, and dozens of brands are competing to be the face of the new movement toward dynamic design and fitness-inspired fashion. With that in mind, here are some slogans I came up with that any athleisure brand is welcome to use.
Make your whole life feel like going to the gym.
Health is the power of aura divided by chafing.
POWERFUL shirts for MEN who want to dress like SEXUAL ROBOTS.
Energy is about eating vitamins and wearing camo socks that cost thirty dollars.
Blend in among the Uniqlo mannequins.
Be an urban soldier in the war against belts and buttons and stuff.
Wear this to work; find out if you work at a startup.
Dare to dream of a yoga pant so high-waisted that it consumes your head and blocks out the sun.
No more “She’ll do it tomorrow”—guilt a stranger into going to the gym TODAY.
Goals are the engine of the locomotive of looking hot.
Sensual ass pants your boyfriend can watch CNN in at the gym.
Unlock your most dynamic you.
What drives us? The dynamic need for you to succeed—naturally.
In this city, you’ve got to be dynamic to be naturally.
Naturally dynamic for a dynamic city that you are also being dynamic in.
Biodynamic design helps us attain new heights of pajamas for hot people.
Don’t get caught at Whole Foods in pants you can’t do full splits in.
For a fun treat that’s a blast for kids: do NOT eat these high-tech leggings.
Be your most yourself you (max size 8).
Every hurdle is an opportunity to stumble, which is an opportunity to fall, which is an opportunity to absolutely eat it, but then you get up. And you are wearing athleisure clothes.
Here’s an idea: a tiny sweater that makes you cold!
Tired of jogging in tuxedo pants but need to look rich while you exercise?
Our laundry tags are a fucking nightmare!
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